Pranking Queen
by Pricilla Harkness
Summary: Bianca is a not-very-normal girl, with an extremely abnormal family. Add being a witch, and what do you get? Hell. Read as she becomes a Marauder, and puts Draco and his "friends" through hell. Gorge/OC Fred/Hermione


**ME NO OWN. **

I waved goodbye to my parents in the retreating car. I looked at my watch, 10:30 half an hour. I looked at my luggage, how was I going to get it to the platform? It's not easy carrying a kitten kennel, a guitar, a portable keyboard, and a trunk, well, anywhere. As I was struggling to pick up, or at least grab all my stuff I heard a voice behind me.

"Do you need some help?"

I turned around to find a brunette around my age smiling kindly.

"uh, yeah, thanks." I replied awkwardly. I wasn't used to anyone offering to help me. I was a loner or a freak show, whichever floats your boat.

"You're from America!" she said in wonder.

"Erm, yeah, I am. I moved here when I was six, but I go back every year. What's your name?" I asked as we started walking to Platform 9.

"Hermione, Hermione Granger. You?"

"Bianca."

"Bianca..."

"Just Bianca. I don't really like my last name, too ironic."

"So, you play guitar?"

"Yeah, music is something I share with one of my favorite cousins. Do you play an instrument?"

"Not really, I play the piano a bit."

"That counts. Hey, when's your train?"

"11:00"

"Mine too. Maybe were on the same one. I'm going to a boarding school in Scotland, you?"

"Same."

"You're going to Hogwarts too?" I asked in amazement. She nodded. I squealed. "Oh my gods! This will be so much fun!"

We went through the barrier, and found seats on the train. We luckily found an empty compartment so we put our trunks up and sat down. I pulled out my guitar and worked on my song.

I started strumming and putting words to the chords and notes.

"Stop there and lemme correct it, I wanna live a life from a new perspective," I sung, then I was stumped for the first time with this song, and Hermione came in with, "You come along because I love your face and I'll admire your expensive taste"

"Wow, Hermione, those are really good. You should write music. You could become really good at it."

"Thanks, I just thought of something, we could start a band together."

"Yeah, that's a good idea. Do you want to play an instrument or sing?"

"Keyboard, and we could both sing. What would we call the band?"

"Blood on the Dance floor? No that's taken, Panic-, no, wait, Panic at the disco's taken too. I got it, Fall Out Boy."

"Two things, that's already taken, and we're girls. How about, … Duo?"

"Duo? Sounds totally badass. I love it."

"Duo it is then."

"Oh, yeah!" I said, slapping her a high-five.

For most of the train ride, we worked on songs and hung out.

~After the Sorting~

I sat at the Ravenclaw table, I know, shocked me too, and listened to Dumbledore's speech. Once he was done, the food appeared. I realized there weren't any braisers, so I took out the lighter I swiped from Uncle Travis and Uncle Conner. I held some brisket and grapes over the flame.

"Hey, what are you doing!" Exclaimed a fifth-year.

"Burning food. Duh." I replied, like it was the most obvious answer in the world, which it was.

"I can see that, but why?"

"I burn grapes for my uncle because he's not allowed his wine, and brisket because it is the one thing everyone else likes." I said, confusing the fifth-year.

~in the dorm~

I decided to plan a school-wide prank that night. I kinda had to. I was the only camper that could hold my own in my frequent pranking wars with my dear uncle/cousin/best friend Hermes.

I would need some help with this one. I decided to enlist the help of two of my cousins/uncles/best friends Hermes and Apollo. Together, the three of us made up the Terrible Trio. We came up with the name when I was little, so don't laugh.

"Oh Iris, goddess of the rainbow, accept my offering, show me Hermes and Apollo." I said, tossing a drachma into the mist. Hermes and Apollo appeared at a fountain on Olympus, about to send me an IM.

"OI! Theivey and The Dim Poet!" I called, to get their attention. They turned around to face me.

"BeeDee!" they exclaimed when they saw me.

"Hey, bros. I need your help."

"What with?"

"Writing an essay. What do you think, idiots?"

"Hey, we may be idiots, but we're your idiots." said Hermes, Apollo nodding until he realized what he said.

"HEY! I'm not an idiot."

"Yeah you are." said Hermes and I at the same time.

"Quit ganging up on me!"

"But, Polly, that would ruin the fun." I said.

"So, Sis, what do you need help with for this prank.?"

"Well, I'm gonna prank the whole school at breakfast, put some stickjaw and electric fizzcocklers in all the food, as well as our candy, you know, we still need a name for that." I said, getting a little off topic at the end. The three of us had made a candy that turns you puke green for 3 hours, it was hilarious wen we put it in the food at camp and a party at Olympus. Especially watching Hermes get chased around by a green Athena and Aphrodite and Hera and Artemis and... anyways.

"I agree, Unnamed be our treat

Pranks that make us three laugh hard

We are so awesome."

Hermes and I groaned.

"Apollo, that may be your best one yet."

"Really?"

"No. back to the topic, how to get it in all the food?"

"Leave that to us, little sister." They said, with twin evil grins on their faces. "you just make sure everyone eats around the same time."

"No problem, everyone is required to eat breakfast on the first day of classes, and have to stay in the great hall until schedules are handed out at the end."

"Good, your food won't have any."

"Thanks."

"Now, go to bed, Theeny will be mad if she finds out how late you were up the night before classes start."

"She won't find out if you don't tell her." I said, giving them my glare. They shivered.

"Fine, but stop glaring at us, it's worse than Percy's Deluxe I'll-kill-you-later glare!" With that, I stopped glaring and said cheerfully, "OK, then. Goodnight big brothers." blowing them both a kiss goodnight, then swiping my hand through the mist to end it.

When I woke up the next morning, my hair was a mess. It was all knotted and messed up. It would take me Waaaaaaaaayyyyy too long to undo it by hand.

"Hey, Dite, little help here?" I said, to the presence in my dorm. I was the only first year Ravenclaw girl.

"Of course, dear." She replied, snapping her fingers, and in a puff of enough perfume to knock someone out, my my long, black hair was brushed out, half-spiky and shiny. I also found my usual makeup and jewelry on as well as an altered uniform.

"Thanks, Dite, but what's with the uniform?"

"It was an insult to me and you, so I changed it to be less frumpy and goody-goody. More you."

"Thanks." I said, giving one of my favorite aunt/cousins a hug.

"No problem, dear. Now, go have fun with your prank."

"How did you know?"

"How do you think?"

"OK! That's enough, don't want to hear about my brothers' sex lives with you!"

She chuckled. "Have it your way." then she disappeared in another puff of perfume.

I walked down to the common room to find most of the house waiting for me and a few others to go down to breakfast. The first week or so The Ravenclaws went to breakfast as a house so new students wouldn't get lost. Their jaws hit the floor when they saw me in all my punk/rock/emo glory.

"Hey, guys, wassup?" I asked in a chipper tone.

"What did you do to your clothes?" Asked Cho Chang, a second year who was my friend.

"Too frumpy and goody-goody. Wrong shade of blue and not enough black, too."

My robe was made less billowy and an inch shorter. My skirt was replaced by black skinny jeans with my chains, my long sleeved button up was replaced by an electric blue t-shirt tat had a skull with a lightning bolt behind it, my sweater was gone, as was my tie, and I had my dad's old aviator jacket on. I was wearing my awesome converse boots as well as my charm bracelet and all my ear piercings had earrings in them. I had one pair of piercings in my earlobes, and one piercing in the top of my left ear. Then the others came down. Again, jaws on the floor.

"You'll catch flies." I said, and they all snapped their mouths shut. "Come on, breakfast!" I said, and so we all went down to the great hall. Everyone sat down and ate right away. I sacrificed a bit of my fruit , then took a bite of my oatmeal. As soon as I swallowed, everyone turned puke green, their teeth stuck together, and their hair stood straight up.

It was the funniest thing I'd ever seen. I started laughing, causing everyone to look at me. Man, they were pissed, except for a few. There were two gingers and a black guy (**not being racist. Just how a stranger might describe them)**looking at me in awe, Dumbledore had a twinkle in his eye and a tiny smile on his lips, and Hermione looked a little mad, but also amused.

"You all's faces!" I managed to gasp out between peals of laughter. Then I realized something and started laughing harder. I got a few questioning looks from some people, so I elaborated, I know, Big word, right?

"Looks best on Slythies!" I shrieked, causing the Gryffindors to beam and give me approving looks, as well as the Ravenclaws and the Hufflpuffs. The Slythies just glared more.

Three of the Slythies stood up. They were all my age.

"Oh, wanna fight, do you?"

The blonde one nodded.

"OK. No magic, just fists."

He nodded again, and one of his brutes came forward.

I beckoned for him to make the first move after standing up.

He charged, and I stepped aside at the last second.

"Seriously? At least give me a challenge. How about Three to One." I said, easily dodging Brute#1. Brute#2 and Blondie came barreling towards me, and I easily dodged them, causing them to crash head on into Brute#1, all three of them fell to the floor, unconscious.

"Nah, need to be a lot more than three on one, maybe twenty on one would be a challenge." I mused out loud.

"As _amusing_ as that was, Miss DiAngelo," said a cold drawl behind me. I turned around to find Professor Snape, in all his greasy haired, hooked nose glory, looking down his giant, hooked nose at me.

"Wait, wait, wait, do you smell that?"

"What?"

"It's something that stinks really bad... I know what it is!"

"What?"

"Your fear of shampoo!" I shouted, releasing everyone's jaws at the same time. Four out of the five tables burst out laughing. Well, the teachers table was only chuckling quietly or smiling, but you get the idea. "I'm surprised you didn't smell it, guess having a big nose doesn't help you smell. Who knew?" Then I ran up to random people and asked them if they knew.

During my free period, while I was on my way down to the lake from my dorm, carrying my guitar and keyboard for a practice with Hermione, I ran into the two gingers from this morning.

"Oi! DiAngelo!"

"Who's askin?"

"Were Fred and George Weasley."

"Well, nice ta meet ya." I said, and continued walking down the stairs.

"That was an amazing prank you pulled this morning."

"Thanks. I'll go crazy if I don't prank that often. Oh, wait, that already happened. Poor me."

"How did you do it?"

"Well, Forge, I'm just awesome that way." I replied, and flounced off to the lake where Hermione was waiting.

"Hey, you ready?"

"Yeah, what kept you?"

"Gred and Forge Weasley were praising my work."

"Aaaaah. Enough chit-chat, lets bet started."

I nodded, and we started the song we finished on the train.

**I feel the salty waves come in **

**I feel them crash against my skin **

**And I smile as I respire **

**Because I know they'll never win  
**

**There's a haze above my TV **

**That changes everything I see **

**And maybe if I continue watching **

**I'll lose the traits that worry me  
**

**Can we fast forward to go down on me?  
**

**Stop there, and let me correct it **

**I wanna live a life from a new perspective **

**You come along because I love your face **

**And I'll admire your expensive taste  
**

**And who cares, divine intervention**

**I wanna be praised from a new perspective **

**But leaving now would be a good idea **

**So catch me up, I'm getting out of here  
**

**Can we fast forward to go down on me?  
**

**Taking everything for granted, but we still respect the time **

**We move along with some new passion knowing everything is fine**

**And I would wait and watch the hours fall in a hundred separate lines **

**But I regain repose and wonder how I ended up inside  
**

**Can we fast forward 'til you go down on me?  
**

**Stop there, and let me correct it **

**I wanna live a life from a new perspective **

**You come along because I love your face **

**And I'll admire your expensive taste  
**

**And who cares, divine intervention**

**I wanna be praised from a new perspective **

**But leaving now would be a good idea **

**So catch me up, I'm getting out of here **

**Catch me up, I'm getting out of here  
**

**More to the point, I need to show **

**How much I can come and go **

**Other plans fell through **

**And put a heavy load on you  
**

**I know there's no more that need be said **

**When I'm inching through your bed **

**Take a look around instead and watch me go **

**Go, go, oh  
**

**Stop there, and let me correct it **

**I wanna live a life from a new perspective **

**You come along because I love your face **

**And I'll admire your expensive taste  
**

**And who cares, divine intervention**

**I wanna be praised from a new perspective **

**But leaving now would be a good idea **

**So catch me up, I'm getting out of here  
**

**It's not fair, just let me perfect it **

**Don't wanna live a life that was comprehensive **

**'Cause seeing clear would be a bad idea **

**Now catch me up, I'm getting out of here **

**So catch me up, I'm getting out of here  
**

**Can we go down on me?**

**Can we fast forward to go down?**

"That. Was. Awesome." I said. Hermione nodded in response. Then we heard clapping. We turned around to find the Weasley twins with awestruck expressions. "Hey, Gred. Hey, Forge. What's up?"

"Well..."

"We were wondering,"

"Most amazing pranker,"

"If we could have the privilege"

"Of pranking with you?"

"Umm, I guess, Hermione you wanna prank with us and their friend with the giant tarantula?"

"Why not. Could be fun."

"Hey, what's with the song?"

"Well, Forge, I have an uncle/cousin/best friend/brother-in-everything-but-blood who enjoys screwing beautiful women."

"What do you mean by screwing?"

"Shagging, fucking, either works. So this song is a gift for him. He helped me pull off the prank this morning,along with my other uncle/cousin/best friend/brother-in-everything-but-blood."

"What are their names?"

I pulled out a sheet of paper and and wrote their names in Greek. To my surprise, all three of them read it out loud. I quickly schooled my face into one of impassiveness.

That night, I IM'd my parents, and saw them having an intense make out session on the couch. Not something I really wanted to see.

"OI!"

They broke apart blushing.

"Not something I needed to see."

"Sorry, Sweetie."

"It's OK, Mom."

"So, what's the problem?"

"I found three people who could be half-bloods. And if they are, they would be kids of powerful gods."

"Who are they?"

"Hermione Granger, Fred Weasley, and George Weasley."

"I'll IM the gods and ask." said my dad.

He went to another room.

"So, who's this George?" Mom asked slyly.

"Why do you ask?"

"I saw the blush. You like him, don't you?"

"Maybe a little."

She raised her eyebrows disbelievingly.

"OK, fine. A lot, but I barely even know the guy, and he could be yours or Dad's brother."

"Sweetie, He's not. I can tell you that much."

"Thanks, Mom."

Then Dad came back into the room.

"Hermione is Athena's daughter, and none of the gods besides Hermes and Athena have been to England in 100 years. Last time Hermes was here, he sired a pair of twins, Fabian and Gideon Prewett, and they were magical, but they died before they had any kids. They had an older sister, Molly. They all had red hair."

"Fred and George ave red hair, and their mom's name is Molly."

"How do you know this?"

"Oh, the Marauders 2 hung out during all our free time today and learned about each other. Do you have a picture of one of the Prewetts?"

"Yeah, this is Fabian." He said, holding up a picture of Fred.

"That's Fred!"

"So Fred and George must be their nephews."

"guess so. What should I do?"

" Just act normal, and we'll ask permission from their parents for them to come on vacation with us for the winter holidays."

"OK and if monsters come, shadow travel, or mist?"

"Shadow travel. The mist won't work there. They're not full mortals, so celestial bronze and imperial gold can hurt them, as well as stygian iron."

"Just my luck."

"It'll be OK. We'll send Travis to help just in case."

"Thanks. I gotta go now. We already have homework."

"OK. Sleep tight, and don't let the bedbugs bite."

"Good night.

The song lyrics are New Perspective by Panic at the Disco


End file.
